17th june - writing writing writing
i miss writing. it's not great but i still miss it. i miss suddenly having an idea, mulling over it for hours and then pulling up the notepad and typing away, and then feeling confident, post it here. when it used to be unlocked. i didn't really care who reads it of if it's being read, but when i loved what i post... man. what a feeling. i repeat what i typed to myself over and over again. it felt good.
i miss feeling good.
i honestly feel the reason why i'm so angry and so lost is because i spend too much time on instagram. it's not even twitter these days. it's instagram. twitter is meh to me, i'm just on there for the laughs or the funny things chrissy teigen and josh groban tweets. but instagram sucked the life out of my life, makes me cranky and jealous and question my life.
this is not new, right?
i want to stop instagram, throw it into the trashcan on my iphone, cast it away. but what if? i mean, there are accounts on it there are great. pet accounts. what if i miss the cats and dogs pictures?
what a conundrum.
in the meantime, i meander and miss writing on diaryland, writing long emails to friends, finding things to talk about, actually finding things out about people by talking or writing instead of getting to know what they're up to or what their interests are via instagram.
i miss great blogs. i miss being inspired by blogs to write better. i miss being in awe by awesome writing. they are only a handfuls, now. and they don't even update much. everything is lifestyle blogs now.
i had a dream kate is pregnant with twin girls, complete with a magazine cover that quoted her "i can't wait to dress them up"! ha. even with a picture of kate in a dress with an arrow pointing to her stomach area, it says "check out the bump we spotted!" haha. and in my dream in the magazine wills had a head full of black hair and he was so cute. doesn't look like real life william but of course it was william. weird.
i was on GOMI and they were talking about kendie and i wasn't the only one thinking kendie is different now. and she does make that tight face instead of having a relaxed smile like the old days. heh. but i don't want her to be so sad and stuff.
GOMI is still going at it with the beautiful mess girls, honestly, they have nothing better to do. it's a case of "when i hate them NOTHING they do will be right. NOTHING. NADA. FOREVER. THEY SUCK." makes me laugh. poor things(the posters)